The whole arc, before the detail
Families ask the same question in almost the same words: what happens at ten days, at twelve, at a month, at a year, and after that? The answer has a shape, and it helps to see the shape first. In the days immediately after the cremation, offerings are made to the departed as one individual, by name. Through the first year those offerings continue at set intervals. At a point in that year the departed is formally joined to the ancestors — this is Sapindikarana, the hinge of the whole sequence. After it, the departed is no longer addressed alone but as one of the pitr, and from then on the family keeps an annual rite on the death tithi, year after year, for generations.
Two things confuse families more than anything else. First, that the rite changes its form partway through the year — it does not simply repeat. Second, that the exact days on which each step falls are not the same in every community. Both are explained below, and neither is a reason to worry.
Ekoddishta Shraddh: the rite aimed at one person
The name says what it is. Eka is one, uddishta is that which is aimed at or intended for. Ekoddishta Shraddh is therefore the shraddh directed at one departed individual — your father, your mother, an elder taken by name and relation in the sankalp. Only that one person is invoked, and the offering is made for them alone.
This is what distinguishes it from the shraddh a household otherwise performs. The ordinary form, called parvan shraddh, is offered to the ancestors collectively — three generations on the father's side, and in most traditions the mother's line as well. There the pind is offered to a group. In Ekoddishta the pind is offered to a single named person, and by long practice the number of pinds, the form of the sankalp and even some of the accompanying acts differ from the collective form.
Ekoddishta belongs mainly to the period before the departed has been joined to the ancestors. That is the plain logic of it: while a person is still being addressed as an individual, the rite for them is individual. It is also why families are told that after a certain point in the first year, this form is no longer the one used for the regular annual observance.
Sapindikarana: the turning point of the first year
Sapindikarana is the rite by which the departed is joined to the ancestors. The word carries the act: sa-pinda-karana, the making of one pind with the others. In the vidhi the pind offered for the departed is united with the pinds offered to the earlier generations, and from that moment the departed is understood to have ceased being a separate presence and to have become one of the pitr.
This is the hinge on which the whole first year turns. Before it, the offerings are Ekoddishta — one name, one person. After it, the family's shraddh for that person is offered in the collective form along with the other ancestors, because that is now what they are. Families who understand only this one point stop being confused about the rest of the sequence.
When it is performed varies, and this is one of the places where communities differ most. Many families do it at the completion of the first year. A great many others perform it within the early days after the death, on the guidance of their purohit and family custom, so that the joining is not left pending for twelve months. Both are long-established practices. What matters is that it is done once, correctly, and that the family knows whether it has already happened.
The customary occasions of the first year
It is better to describe these by their traditional markers than by fixed numbers, because the numbers genuinely differ. Broadly, four kinds of occasion make up the first year. First, the observances of the days immediately following the cremation, when daily offerings are made for the departed as an individual. Second, the point at which the family completes the initial period of ashaucha and holds the larger gathering — commonly on the tenth, eleventh, twelfth or thirteenth day, depending on community and on the guidance of the family purohit.
Third, the monthly offerings through the year. In many families a shraddh is kept each month on the corresponding tithi — often described as the masik shraddh — and certain of these months are given additional weight, such as the completion of the sixth month and of the eleventh. Some households observe every month without exception; others observe only the marked ones. Both are followed.
Fourth, the completion at the year's end, on the return of the death tithi. This is the occasion most families call the barsi, and in many traditions it is also the point at which the first-year sequence is regarded as closed. From here the rite settles into its annual form and continues.
We are deliberately not stating any of these day-counts as a universal rule. Which days your family keeps, and on which of them the larger rite falls, is settled by your community's practice and your purohit's instruction — not by an article.
Varshik or Barsi Shraddh: the rite that continues every year
Varshik Shraddh is the annual rite kept on the departed's death tithi. It is reckoned by the tithi of the Hindu calendar, not by the English date, which is why it moves across the calendar year and why families check the panchang each year rather than marking a fixed date. Many households call it simply the barsi, or the punya tithi.
The karta is normally the same person who performed the earlier rites — traditionally the son, and among sons the eldest, with the recognised order of eligibility taking over where there is no son. The offering is made in the collective form once Sapindikarana has been performed, which is to say the departed is invoked as one of the ancestors and not addressed alone. This is the single point on which families most often go wrong when they try to work it out for themselves.
What is offered on the day is what a shraddh always contains, kept to the household's capacity: tarpan with water and black til, the pind of cooked rice or barley flour, and the feeding — brahmin bhojan where the family follows that practice, along with a portion set aside for the cow, the crow and the dog, and daan according to means. Many families also keep the day simple and quiet, with the purohit at home, no gathering, and the karta observing a light fast until the offering is complete.
The annual shraddh does not end after a set number of years. It is kept for as long as the household keeps it, passing from one karta to the next. Alongside it, most families also offer to the ancestors during the fifteen days of Pitru Paksha each year, which is a separate observance for the line as a whole and does not replace the tithi rite.
Where Gaya Shraddh fits into this
Gaya Shraddh is not a substitute for the annual rite, and it is honest to say so plainly. It is held to be of a different and higher order — a rite performed at a tirtha, in a place the tradition regards as specially fit for the ancestors, and one that a family may perform once and still count as fulfilled. That is why families travel for it even decades after a death, and why it is spoken of as settling the pitru-rin in a way the home rite does not claim to.
But it should not be presented as excusing a household from all further obligation. What most families actually do is the balanced thing: they perform the Gaya rite once, with the full sankalp and the offerings at the sacred sites, and they continue the annual shraddh at home on the tithi as they always have. The two sit together. One is the journey made once; the other is the duty kept every year.
Families sometimes ask whether the Gaya rite can be timed to the first year — on the death tithi, or in the months of the first-year sequence. It can, and many do come at such times. Whether it suits your family's situation, and whether Ekoddishta for the one departed should be added to the main Gaya Shraddh on the same visit, is a matter for the Tirth Purohit who hears your details, not a rule that applies to everyone.
What is actually done at each of these rites
Strip away the names and the same few acts recur throughout. Sankalp comes first: the karta declares who is performing the rite, for whom, where and on what tithi, with the gotra and the names spoken aloud. Nothing is offered before the sankalp is taken.
Then tarpan, the offering of water. Water with black til and kusha is taken in the joined palms and released in the name of the departed or of the ancestors, generation by generation. It is called the act of satisfying. In the Ekoddishta form the names invoked are of the one person; in the collective form the earlier generations are taken in their order.
Then the pind: a small round offering shaped by hand, usually of cooked rice, in many traditions of barley flour, with black til, water, honey, milk and ghee given alongside, placed on an asan of kusha. The number of pinds and the order of offering are what change between the individual and the collective forms, and this is why the purohit's direction matters at that step.
And then the feeding. Brahmin bhojan where the family follows it, a portion kept aside for the cow, the crow and the dog, food given to those in need, and daan of grain, cloth or according to means. The offered pinds are not discarded — they are released into flowing water or given to a cow, both treated as proper. What differs between a ten-day rite, a monthly one, a barsi and a Gaya Shraddh is the scale, the place and the invocation, not the substance of these acts.
Regional and community variation, stated honestly
The variation here is real and it is large. The day on which the main post-death rite is held differs between communities. The timing of Sapindikarana differs, some placing it within the early days and some at the year's completion. Whether the monthly shraddh is kept every month or only in the marked months differs. Whether the departed's mother's line is invoked, how many pinds are offered, whether barley or rice is used, what is given in daan — all of this varies by region, by community and often by the practice of a particular family line.
None of these differences makes one family's practice wrong. The tradition has always allowed for kula-achara, the custom of one's own line, and a rite performed according to the custom a family has actually followed is the correct rite for that family. Trouble comes only when a household abandons its own practice because a relative from a different community insisted their way was the only way.
So take what you read anywhere, including here, as the general shape and not as the ruling for your house. The shape is reliable: individual offerings first, joining to the ancestors at the turning point, collective offerings every year after. The specifics belong to your own tradition.
What to ask your purohit to pin down
Take five questions and get plain answers to each, and your family's sequence stops being a matter of guesswork. First: on which day does our community hold the main rite after the death, and which of the days in between are we to observe? Second: has Sapindikarana already been performed for this person, and if not, when should it be done? Third: are we to keep the shraddh every month this year, or only in the marked months?
Fourth: after this year, is the annual rite to be offered in the individual form or the collective form — and which tithi exactly do we take, since a tithi can span two English dates. Fifth: who in our family is the karta now, and who takes it up after him. Write the answers down and keep them with the family papers. Most of the confusion in the next generation comes from nobody having written this down in this one.
If the rite you are planning is at Gaya, a Gayawal Tirth Purohit can confirm your family's own sequence and tell you what should be performed there and what should continue at home. Guidance calls are free, and it is better to ask than to fix a date on a guess.